Tuesday, June 22, 2010

wanting to throw in the flag

I've been angry, depressed, exhausted, sad, hurt, tired, over worked and more lately. I've been doing nothing but arguing with my so called father and dealing with an out of control, attitude, druggie brother here at home. Will it ever end? I wish I could move out right this minute. I had to go buy a new door knob with a lock on it just to keep my 17 year old brother out of my room because he takes my shit. My father hasn't been much of a father and everything about him drives me crazy as if he is trying to make my life even worse. Now I don't want to sit here and write a sob story and feel all sorry for myself but jeez I'm sick of everything!

My pharmacy called this morning. They have been trying to work on getting me a refill authorization for my Enbrel from my DR offices but have been getting shuffled back and forth so I called my Primary DR and insisted the lady check my file because she was saying she had no paper about it. Well I hope she felt like an idiot because she did find it and because of her I may not get my medications on time now. Thank you, DR office lady for not knowing HOW TO DO YOUR DAMN JOB. I'm so sick and tired of this bullshit. & my "Father" decided to rub in my face about how I won't have insurance by Dec, Thank you for the reminder you ass hole.


  1. Hey I totally know how you are feeling. I have been dealing with my own frustrations and bumps in the road. As far as the insurance, don't let it stress you out too much. As someone who has RA and no insurance, yeah it's a bit harder and you have plan things out. But it's do-able. I mean, I found a great Rheumy who realizes that I am A) un-insured and B) out of work. And we have worked out a pricing that works for both of us. So just take a step back and things will work out.

  2. I am sorry you are feeling so down. Chronic Illness and emotions go hand in hand. And families – wait until you have one of your own. You will know that your own family is not any different than the one you were born into. You just have to be on the other side, instead of being the child, you will be the parent. Don’t dwell too much on December. Something will work, whether you find a full-time job and get benefits, apply for medical assistance and qualify or deal with free clinics and patient prescription assistance through the drug companies – things will work themselves out. You are too young to let these things consume you. Focus on your friendships, finding a soul mate, your education and your career. Again, things will work out.

  3. I'm so sorry things are rough for you right now. Parents don't always act the way they should, and brothers can be asses sometimes, especially dumbass druggie ones. (I speak from experience, here.)

    Hopefully, this will if not brighten your day, make it seem a smidge better: http://cupsquietlybeingfilled.wordpress.com/2010/07/13/you-like-me-you-really-like-me.